Tuesday, 8 August 2017

Those buried promises!

18th April 2017

Pema Choki
Everything I had believed to be mine was fake. Nothing was real. His lies had covered up everything making me believe him foolishly.

Tshewang Tobgay
I had been trying my best to gather enough courage from the day I met her to tell her the truth but I failed it all the time. I didn't want her to think she was second in my life. The risk was always heavy to carry.

Pema Choki
It took me a whole week to talk and convince my parents about the man I loved and chose to be my partner for life: Tshewang Tobgay. They finally consented me to marry him this morning. I was dancing in delight as I passed on this wonderful news to him.

Tshewang Tobgay
She finally answered to my marriage proposal. She said that she was ready to be my wife. She sounded so sincere with the joys and happiness. She had the least idea that she was to be my second wife, not the first.
I met her a year ago at my workplace. She joined in my office as my junior. For me, it was the love at first sight. I couldn’t even give a proper judgement about her that I was in love with her. At first she judged me flirty and didn’t respond. As I grew consistent in poking her, she demanded time so that she could think. And while all these, I could hardly think of browsing my painful history for her reference.

Pema Choki
It was towards the beginning of spring last year when this man whom I knew very less proposed me (and was my senior at office) during one of my colleague’s birthday. Since he was little drunk I hardly gave a thought on what he said. But the next day he approached me confessing it was the truth and that he was serious about me. He kept on nagging for a couple of days and I had no other option than to think and provide him a definite answer.

Tshewang Tobgay
We started dating soon. I was knowing her everyday. She owned a very fragile heart that would be grieving even if a stranger gave a dissatisfied look to her without even knowing if that one was for her or not. I was determined not to take any risk for her fragile heart by digging up my past which I had forever buried into my memories. All that mattered to me was Pema and our future together. I wanted to make her my future. I wanted to make her my wife. So I proceeded on with the marriage proposal last weekend while we visited the scared Paro Kyichu Lhakhang.

Pema Choki
Tshewang suddenly asked me to accompany him to offer butter lamps at Kyichu Lhakhang last Sunday. He just told me that he wanted to pray to the future Buddha- Jow Jampa for a prosperous future for the both of us. Once there, I fell in love with the blooming spring flowers outside the Lhakhang premises and I immediately asked him to take my photographs with that exotic scene behind me. He smiled and clicked some quick snaps and handed me back my phone. When I was done with checking the photographs on my phone, Tshewang was nowhere to be seen. Moments later his photo vibrated on my mobile screen. I received him immediately and before I could say a word, he spoke out, “Will you marry me Pema?” I couldn’t believe my ears. He repeated the same question three times and by then tears had made their way down my cheeks. I couldn’t answer him and within no time he reached me from back and gave me the warmest back hug.

Tshewang Tobgay
I was 100% sure that she would say a yes to my proposal and as expected it was a yes from her. But...this is a fashion with Bhutanese girls that they would firstly seek the permission from their parents  and then only give a finalized answer. So it took her a week to talk to her parents about me and our relationship. She had readied herself and her family for our marriage and future together. Just when things were getting to the point, my past cast it’s shadows.

Pema Choki
There was no question of believing what that woman told me this afternoon because I knew that he was never married and have not even mentioned to me if he had. The woman by the name Tshering Choden pointed to her 5 year old son and told me if he didn’t look like Tshewang. I closed my eyes because I believed him more than anyone else. But moments later I was proved wrong as I saw the guilt in his eyes when he faced me and Tshering Choden together. He couldn’t meet my gaze at all. He fell short of word and there was no explanation from him. I was to collapse seeing my man in a condition filled with guilt resulted from his lies.

Tshewang Tobgay
I couldn’t believe my past came and ruined my future. Words were hard to form as I thundered into thousands thoughts when a 5 year old claimed me as his father. All these years I didn’t know I had a son. My ex wife Tshering whom I have separated years ago brought up my baby (as she claimed) alone and now she had brought him to me as he wished to see his father. When did I become a father? How I didn’t know this? Tshering went on with her justification that she wanted to be the single parent for her son as she neither wanted to get back to me nor bring in a step father to her little son.

Pema Choki
It’s funny! I mean the surprise was really good and it seriously knocked me to the ground. So this was it. I have been played well. Tshering and Tobgay went on with their talks about the child (their kid) where their history was re winded several times and how everything landed up the way things are. I had then stepped off from their way. It was extremely hard but I have no other option.

Tshewang Tobgay
Upon inquiring a lot, I had to face and accept the ultimate truth that I was a father to a kid and I bore responsibilities towards him. Being his father meant sacrificing so many things including Pema. Her level of self respect didn't permit her to marry a kid's father and become a step mother. It was me, not my son or my past who caused the damage as I disappointed her in telling my past.
I miss her so much and I know she too miss me but we have been barred. We both have been drawn towards our own lives. I decided to take up the responsibility of my son despite my ex-wife's reluctance because he was my son, my responsibility.

After seven months...
Pema Choki
Months have passed now and things are much more normalized. I am feeling happy today. I met Tshewang and his cute son in the market and they both looked so good and happy together. The decision I and Tshewang had made to separate for his son's happiness yielded fruit. May god bless this father and son always.

Tshewang Tobgay
I  saw and met Pema after such a long time today. She left the office few weeks after we separated and then I hardly knew where she was. Now I can say she is doing fine and happy too. I hope and pray she find (or may be already found) a man with more courage to love and tell her the truth every time and be blessed with happiness always.

Sunday, 16 July 2017

16th July- A Special Day!

Today i.e. 16th of July, I share a beautiful tale of a colorful and happy soul I have known for the past few years. Here is to you Miss Tshering Yangki, who is completing 23 years of sparkling reign in the hearts of her lovely family and almost four years in my life now.
Tshering Yangki


She was born to pretty mother Sonam Lhamo and handsome father Tashi Tobgay as their first child in the JDWNRH on this special day. She has grown up in the protective cocoon of her loving granny (abi) who has not left any stone un-turned ensuring her a glittering childhood. And I am told by herself only that she was the most most short-tempered baby ever…that’s so bad Yangki! Soon a younger brother came into her family which divided the love from her parents and abi. And few years later she was blessed with a younger sister who is currently serving as her secret chamber.  Being the eldest, she has imparted the justice and given the best of her to both her younger siblings and parents.

Studies were the top priority and because of this she excelled in her academics and had gathered enough marks and karma to meet a friend like me in college…lol. I still remember the first time I saw her at the Indira Gandhi International Airport in August 2013. She looked so tiny but smiled heavily and carried that abnormally heavy purple trolley. The two guys who accompanied me to the airport were completely awestruck carrying her huge trolley. So here are some of the best memories collections with her I have in words and few pictures as well:

For the first six months of our college we ate from the hostel common mess and I still remember the way we had our meals together there. I would go to the food counter with a big and small bowl and pour in the food for two people. Once on the dining table, we would insert our individual spoons and feed ourselves. Everyone noticed and knew us this way and so even the cook would tell me to take more food as two of us was eating from one bowl. Some described us as too much cute and sweet together.

Like boys, we managed to sacrifice our sleeping time and stay awake till midnight to catch up a match between our favorites: Cristano Ronaldo and Lionel Messi. We had very less knowledge about the club and all those leagues but still we dared watching and entertaining ourselves with those matches.

At the Sukhna lake, Chandigarh

And how can I forget our sudden Chandigarh trip in September 2014? We abruptly planned the trip a day before and by the next day afternoon the two of us were seated in the bus at Kashmere gate which was scheduled to depart for Chandigarh. It was 8 pm when we got out of the bus at Zirakpur, Chandigarh and waited there anxiously for our friends. Once our friends reached there, we had a crazy bike ride in a completely unknown and new place.

2015, Nepal earthquake perhaps would be the most dreaded natural disaster for us. And the residents of Delhi had the most terrible nightmares due to the aftershocks we were subjected to now and then. Yangki and me too were left frightened which forced us to vacate the hostel at the earliest and took shelter somewhere else.

Once in a life time opportunity

One of the best privileges I have received and of which I am dearly thankful to her is the Dharamshala trip. Those cold rainy days under the snowy mountains and a once-in-a-life-time audience with His Holiness Dalai Lama are something I treasure massively. The Tenzhug (long-life offering) offering and having a chance to listen to the teachings from His Holiness live are forever imprinted on our hearts as the most blessed moments in our life.

The first lunch at embassy
Splashing water at the Park
Our first sightseeing: Lotus temple
At the WoW
At the KOD
Bhutanese on the stage

We had those frequent lunches at the Embassy canteen and then the most popular Sarojini Market shoppings, so many sightseeings and our adventurous visits to World of Wonders, Kingdom of Dreams, Splash Water Park and Akshardham temple. The one and only rendezvous night at Jamia Hamdard which made us present a lovely cultural item portraying our colorful flag and a unique dress code on a foreign land made us the most proud Bhutanese ever.

Evening walk at India gate

I really miss our lovely evening walk from Rashnaprati Bhavan to India gate and our grocery shoppings from Alakhnanda Market.

Those lengthy delayed train journeys had been the biggest part of our college memories. While in the train, we lost our battle to the sleep though we were very much aware of the robbery that mostly happened during the night time when the passengers slept. And this even made me remember the smelly train food we were offered and having no other option, we had to eat those foods.

Adorning with Boe-gho for a tibetan perfromance

We gave a number of performances at the embassy celebrations of our King’s Birth Anniversary and those were just the proud things we did as a Bhutanese under the reign of our visionary Monarchs.

A crazy time

All these came down to the memorable farewell night which was the official end to our college life and to us, the end of being roommates. This has been the saddest part. We couldn’t stay in that Room No: A-702 forever. It was a place in this whole world where we created so many fond memories and had done so many crazy stuffs. The only room whose walls had developed the resistance to our donkey voices as we consistently assumed ourselves to be Taylor Swift and Minzung Lhamo. The only space which was safe for the two of us to share our deepest secrets and thoughts including all our worries and fears which we could never dare to say somewhere else. So let’s take a moment to thank our kind room here.
Our lovely room


Our last trip to Alakhnanda

There seems to be so many other memories which are both funny and emotional but let me keep this till here and wish you:
Happy Birthday Yangki
Be the lovely person you are
May you be always happy and smiley…just like the first time I saw you
Love you always and forever
Tashi Chenzom